Never thought the hardest decision I ever had to make with my life came with the scorn of others. But, I guess you can't win with everyone.
Anyway, I've decided on joining the Army since my last post here, and am hopeful, cause its the only thing I have left, that it will lead me and that which I care for to a better future. Though, as the reflective attitude that I've been bringing upon myself seems to bee keeping up, I've come to notice that I feel as though I've lost a part of myself in my desperate struggle to survive and get any form of support structure. Though, I guess survival at any cost tends to do that. Its just my forgetful mind can't even think of what that part of me might be. I know I haven't been as creative as I could be, and I know I should be. But, I have no access to a scanner to include my non-digital work, and I lost the stylus to my tablet in one of my plethora of moves across the country. Its not that I haven't been doing it, but I took a lot more joy out of it by being able to show it. If that makes any sense.
Anyway, this is just a short little thing, a blurb to get my thoughts and frustrations out a bit. I'm done with rants that are used to attack and punish me, which just builds up the stress instead of releasing it as what a rant is for. So, that's all I can give on the subject. Either way, I'm looking to possibly be making a Let's Play/Let's Draw channel once I'm no longer in any state of homelessness and of course am happy that I'll be able to send my first, of the three I actually finished, books out to a publisher, and that should help. I'm just terrified that I'll lose my femininity and any more parts of me though this military excursion, but its for me to survive, and for the best computer a person could ask for to have a roof over its head and a plug to give it power. Great, now I'm all teary eyed, gotta get my t-girl self together.
I'll wrap this up, and am on steam for those who don't know, you can add me if you like the username is Batchiryuu, which will most likely become my online persona in the world of lets plays, but its something that I enjoy. I like watching others play games, and though I'm not confident in my comedy, I enjoy making things for others.
Anyway, Later Days.
Listening to: Die by Jeff Williams
Reading: Heroes Rise: The Hero Project
Watching: Sailor Moon Crystal/ Fate/ Unlimited Blade Works
Playing: Minecraft PC/ Civ 5/ Random Visual Novel